A Christian leader says he knows that his sin of agreeing to his girlfriend’s abortion has been forgiven, because of Jesus.
Garrett Kell, who today is the lead pastor of Del Ray Baptist Church in Virginia, told his story on the day his child would have become 18 years old.
“I think about the fact that I never heard my child’s laughter. Never locked eyes for the first time. Never saw a smile or cheered first steps”, he wrote on The Gospel Coalition website.
It is forgiven
Kell said that while he does think about those missed moments, he does not dwell on them, “because God intervened” to say: “Do not fear, it is forgiven”.
Addressing his readers directly, Kell – now married and a father of five – wrote: “God’s grace is enough to cover your transgression and give comfort in its place”.
Explaining the situation he was in nearly 20 years ago, the pastor wrote that he loved his “carefree” life.
Do not fear, it is forgiven.Garrett Kell, on God's forgiveness
But that changed when his girlfriend became pregnant. “When she broke the news to me, I was a little nervous, but reassured her we’d figure out a way to make it.”
He said this “empty assurance” preceded his girlfriend asking him if he was going to marry her. But he said he was not ready for that.
Someone then gave his girlfriend the money to have an abortion and Kell wrote: “I was there when she took the pill. I was there when we flushed our child down the toilet. I was there when we cried, even though we didn’t know why. And some days I’m still there.”
But he said a year later someone told him the good news about Jesus Christ, and he began to see himself in a new perspective.
“I was a person so in love with myself that I agreed to end my own child’s life in order to keep my life going in the direction I wanted”.
Kell continued: “But this is where the gospel shines light into the darkness with rays of life-giving hope.”
“So today, when I look back to what I did, I may still feel grief, but there is a comfort the Father of mercies gives in the midst of it. Not a comfort that says, ‘It’s okay, don’t feel bad,’ but rather, ‘Do not fear, it is forgiven’, Kell said.